"You don't give up, do you? I should call you Tenacious D"

 Just my thoughts. I haven't written in so long. Well, I have, but nothing I could publish. I've hit a bit of a rough patch but I'm hoping for bluer skies. As always, I'm so grateful you even take the time to read my blog. It's my therapy, my way of coping. 

 As I sit on the couch I can't help staring at him. Then again, I always find myself staring at him. However, this time it's different. I see him differently than I did a month ago. More vulnerable? Maybe. He reclines back in grey sweats and no shirt, his dad's old guitar across his body covering his tattoos as he plays. I watch his fingers as he plucks at the strings. He tunes the guitar and it makes this creeeeak noise. Every once in a while his mouth will move to imitate what his fingers are doing. Songs of Metallica, Pink Floyd, even Quiet Riot played out (which acoustically made me giggle because it was unbelievably entertaining) and I listen to him serenade me. It's been months since he's done it. God, I missed him. I close my eyes blissfully and he starts to play a song that immediately makes my eyes well up with tears. It's an old 80's or 90's song with lyrics that talk about don't just say the words, but show me you love me. It's only when he plays it, do I have this reaction. The way his face changes, softens. How his hands move and his eyes close. How he taps the guitar with his thumb. All that is running through my mind is, "Thank you, God, for giving me this man. For whatever lessons I have to learn, whatever I'm supposed to teach, whatever this crazy journey is, I'll do it. Thank you." D puts the guitar down and stands up. His sweats hang loosely around his hips and exposes his ( I had to look this word up) inguinal creases. Which is just the technical term for those hot hip lines on a guy like you see on the Abercrombie and Fitch models. It's my favorite part on him, well, one of my favorites. I look at him like a wolf in a cartoon with the eyes that reach out to here and the big GAZOOOOOGAH sound comes out. "I'm gonna go have one more smoke and maybe we can go to bed. I'm kinda tired," he says. I must've said, "yeah," or,"ok," but, really, who the fuck knows. I'm still looking at him like a he's a sandwich and I'm starving like a hostage. I go to the bedroom to fix the covers, take off my clothes, and slide in the cool sheets. When I hear the door my heart races. After a year and a half D still has this effect on me. He stands at the foot of the bed and I get one more look at him with only the soft glow of the bedside lamp. I wonder, do other people feel like this? He takes off his sweats and slips into bed next to me. He wraps his arms around me. Our legs intertwine and I inhale him. He smells so good. His skin is smooth and his body hard. I run my hands over his shoulders and down his back.
 "I thought you said you were tired," I say to him as he kisses my neck.
 "I'm never too tired for you."
 "I love you," I whisper into his mouth in between kisses.
 He touches my face, "I love you."

 My song picks for today are: More Than Words by Extreme and Cum On Feel The Noise by Quiet Riot 

I hope this post finds you all well. Enjoy the changing leaves and the cool air. The colors are so beautiful. Love, R